it is what it is

meeting 2 of my friends that already resume studies in Master.
dinner with another two that landed theirselves in KL's prestigious firms.
chatting with a friend.Just got herself into TR Hmzah & Yeang.

What more than any of these,to make me feels like a loser.
Being the pessimistic me,who overthink excessively,i havent send out my resumes.

I admit,sitting on the couch all day is not my thing,but to start working,to really,really committed to something,i wasnt sure i m ready..I have my brain preoccupied with all these 'what ifs'.What if i cant do this?what if i dont get my works done on time?what if they throw me out of the office?Too much of what ifs gives me painful headaches.

I've even try to consult with my super senior who already in UK for her studies(again,depressed.)
At the last of her sentences,she reminded me,
'Always think yourself as a learner,not a worker'
ahh.a slight of relief.
thanks kak shiela.

I need to remind myself of positivity.Accompany by His guide.I know I must trust Him for all things happen next.

It is what it is.Dear 22 self,You are no longer 13 years old who costantly yawn and cries.Not anymore.Come and get the money,honey!

Kata nak kaya.

positivity please.

http://elitedaily.com/life/15-things-happy-people-dont-do/
 i reaally have to stop doing this.

'5. Seek Validation From Others'

Happy people do not look to others to confirm their self-worth. They recognize their value on their own and don’t live up to anyone’s expectations. They do things for themselves that they believe will advance them in life. By not concerning themselves with the opinions of others, they can focus on personal growth.

a dusty one

see who we bumped into at Nouman Ali Khan's talk.
this shall be a dusty post because as we knew his talk already ended nearly 2 weeks ago.LOL

Gosh I wish we have more speakers/educators/lecturers/thinkers like him in Malaysia.Not to say U.A.I's not good,but i prefer this man speech deliverance,which was beyond awesome and the subject he brought into the hallroom,Miracle of Quran,subhanallah,this reminds me of how maaany beautiful things i didnt realise while i was holding & simply read those ayat in the Quran blindly. :(
and found this,too.

FATS NEVER MAGICALLY DISAPPEAR.

it's almost 2 weeks since i started to exercise.bear in mind people,exercise and workout are two different regimes to pull out(exercise's the mild one.less rough).it's funny how i actually can cycle around the neighbourhood for almost an hour.Then i would go for slow walking(as doctor advised me to do so since i have small feets,he said).All together makes up more than one hour.yup,to actually burn calories,you need more than one hour of exercising,then only your body starts to take things seriously.-,-

to my own suprise,i've turned from someone  who goes to supermarket,obliviously picking up things and straight up to cashier,into someone who literally checked what's actually inside of th orange juice on the back of the pack,before i actually gonna purchase it.aand i didnt took the smaller pack..i was surely in shocked knowing the actual amount of sugar they put in there.to think how religiously i drank 1 litre of Peelfresh during my noob days when i started my diet routines(konon healthy),err im in regret isk isk isk.I actually drank orange flavoured-sugar drink instead of the innocent orange juice haih(we're easily melt with nice packaging,right) next time,never let 'nutritional facts' pass our eyes easily.at least they stickered something true about the product.

The amount of carbs we consumed is something we should watch for.Those who wants to shed/peel/burn their fats,never exceed 20 g of carbs PER DAY.HAHA.i still cheat on this one.Susah,okay.
Till then,blog!

OMG

these past few days had been really,really ermm 'incredibly satisfying'..?
let's just say,i began a fresh start,ladies and gents.
1st day
the first time i hiked the hill,i almost exhausted to deaathh.seriously.
an old man overpassed me and asked 'awak umur berapa..'
yeah go on asking me like that,uncle. -,-
this is my second attempt in million years i went for hiking and of course,i hyperventilated like cray cray. T_______T

2nd day
Almost died like the first day.Battle continues.

3rd day
Mild running.A few miles from home.Avoid friendly neighbours who offered a ride back home.

4th day
Badminton with sis,cycling around neighbourhood.

5th day
Yayy i cant believed i didnt take too much stops before we got to the top.muahaha.The stamina has gone better,insyaallah!heheh

Hmm i reaally hope i dont stop half way,man.i want some 'legit curves'.i want to be satisfied.i want a brand new me.Givin myself one year.One year of transformation.Perseverance & Patience are two words i must hold on to,.....from now on.

running or hiking,ey?

http://healthyliving.azcentral.com/burns-fat-running-hiking-15542.html

p e r f e c t h i a t u s

havent been in here for quite some time.everywhere's dusty and rusty,no?well,hi blog.

i guess i've been drugged by laziness and current obsession on keeping myself in a quite room.

i already prepared a list of things-to-do and the number just keep growing and mann,i havent made an attempt for job interviews (my 'baju kerja' and the nice pair of leather loafers will have to stay in the wardrobe before i decide on making my portfolio,ngahaha).'nevertheless',my nearly adequate ample time is filled with some quite cool activities,i tell ya.

Lemon-aid Project | KanvasKosong | Hike-Hike-Hike | Akstrakt

i rather not mumble and talking like an empty can.

hence..

till we meet again,blog.

...

semua orang ada cita-cita,hala tuju.kau dan dia,tak kan sama.yang penting,asal kau yakin percaya yang kau punya,kejarlah ia.

EXAGGERATE,IMPULSE,EXPLOAD,EXTRA,LOUD,EXTREME.

LAST BUT NEVER LEAST.STRONG FAITH TO GO ALONG.

When I say I'ma do something I do it,
I don't give a damn what you think,
I'm doing this for me, so fuck the world

tolong masukkan aku dalam kapsul.aku malas nak menghadap dunia sekarang ni.

"Sembunyikan kebaikanmu sebagaimana kamu sembunyikan keaibanmu.."

whistle if you now have a pair of jeans awaits!

0.5 saat

bila dia terpacak betul-betul depan mata.hamek kau.tapi aku bagi senyum ragu-ragu dlm 0.5 saat tapi dia pandang je.tapi nak kata dupdapdupdap pun tak de pun.heh.rasa kelakar....sangat. -,-

Human being to the mob
What's a mob to a king?
What's a king to a God?
What's a God to a non believer?
Who don't believe in anything.

Very manipulating,you people.It takes a deep thought to swallow the meaning & not letting yourself fall for this.

to Him we gave ourselves.

“Ya Allah, aku berlindung denganMu daripada keluh kesah dan kesedihan, dan aku berlindung denganMu daripada kelemahan dan kemalasan, dan aku berlindung denganMu daripada sifat pengecut dan bakhil, dan aku berlindung denganMu daripada bebanan hutang dan daripada penindasan orang.”

yes.say goodbye to your closetmates.im takin you off the rack for moi soon to be new bag!ngehehe

alkisah pembeli dan penjual di tgh malam

scumbag shop owner!how can she laughed at the end of conversation leaving me startled & all gelabah wanting this bag so much.

oh on the other hand,this means catfight.

"come & get me."

a good day is today!

Meet Baby AliaButang!She cried when saw us strangers but yeeah we still got to grab you babeh!

here;s one more happy news.you knew you're one lucky girl when you fell in love with a pair of boyfriend pants that sell in store that don't deliver to m'sia*superlame* but then you got friends in europe tht can help  bringing this dream jeans right to your doorstep??

ignorance ISNT always bliss.

i always wonder why they said it's sunat to read Al-Kahfi on your Jumaat basis.this surah is actually consist of pages long enough that i always stop reading half than the halfway.teruk ni.and on top of all,i didnt even do it on my weekly basis.

however,it is a relief to found this (after some time).

Rasulullah saw bersabda:“Barangsiapa yang membaca sepuluh ayat dari surat Al-Kahfi, ia tidak akan terkena bahaya fitnah Dajjal, barangsiapa yang membaca seluruh ayatnya ia akan masuk surga.” Hadis ini bersumber dari Sammarah bin Jundab dari Nabi saw. (Tafsir Nur Ats-Tsaqalayn 3: 242)

and being the worst human,i always took things lightly back in asrama when they say 'let's practice Al-Mulk every night before we go to bed.'no.i never did.not till now that i discover the virtues of the Surah itself.

• Rasulullah Shallallahu ‘Alaihi Wasallam bersabda: “Sebahagian surah-surah yang terdapat di dalam Al-Quran ada satu surah yang mengandungi 30 ayat. Surah itu surah Al Mulk. Ia memberi syafaat kepada orang yang membacanya dengan mengeluarkannya dari Neraka dan memasukkannya ke dalamSyurga.” 

• Ulama berkata: ”Sesungguhnya surah Al Mulk itu melepaskan pengamal-pengamalnya dari kena azab. Ia akan bersoal jawab pada hari kiamat di hadapan Tuhan kerana menuntut kelepasan mereka yang mengamalkannya dari azab api Neraka

haih.we often want to prove ourselves the best with people around us.but what happen to our relationship with our Maker?I often fail to show Him that i love Him,proving i'm one right creation to Him.that i know He's always be the One that i turn to when im in downside of life.that the reason of my living breath is nothing but only,for Him.

How can He constantly pour the love to His slaves,while people like me often live in ignorance without doing deeds,purely in the name of Allah.'I study architecture in the name of Allah','i eat in the name of Allah','i sleep in the name of Allah'.I'm awake & alive because of Allah.

I often being forgetful.Shame on it.but that's us,human.Our faith always been tested without us realising it.

we forget that Apart from disaster and disease,happiness & prosperity also reckon as test in this life.

Being a better muslim is everyone's hope.but,to practice what you preach is another different story.

Might be among the toughest  challenge to be a better person.

Though im among those people who still climbing up/crawling in doing things in life that please God,i wish He could smile on me.What a feel!amin ya rabbal alamin.insyaallah.

My heart is beyond gratitude to God for surround & blessing me with my loving family and friends.I wanted them to know how much i appreciate their presence in my everyday life despite my wrongdoings(pranking,bullying,temperamental being on top of the list)  thoroughout my life and that i pray for each one of them success in life & hereafter.

Alkisah, seorang laki – laki setengah baya sedang duduk sendirian, memperhatikan matahari yang berangsur – angsur tenggelam. Suasananya cukup hening. Ia melihat begitu indahnya warna langit yang di penuhi dengan mega berwarna kuning jingga. Ia memperhatikannya dengan seksama, hingga akhirnya suasana indah itu hilang seiring dengan tenggelamnya matahari di ufuk barat.

Entah apa penyebabnya, tiba – tiba ia tak mampu membendung air matanya. Hatinya terasa pedih. Ia menangis tersedu – sedu. Ia menengadahkan kedua tangannya sambil berkata :

"Ilahi lastu lil firdausi ahlan
Walaa aqwaa ‘alannaril jahiimii
fahabli taubatan waghfir dzunuubi
fainnaka ghafirudzdzambil ‘adzhiimii
dzunuubi mitslu a’daadir rimali
fahablii taubatan yaa dzal jalaali
wa ‘umrii naaqishun fii kulliyaumi
wa dzambii zaa idun kaifahtimali
ilahi ‘abdukal ‘aashi ataaka
muqirran bi dzunubi waqad da’aaka
fa in taghfir faanta lidzaka ahlun
wa in tadrud faman narjuu siwaakaa “

Yang artinya ;
” Ya Tuhanku, aku tidaklah pantas menjadi ahli syurga firdausMu
Namun aku juga tak kan sanggup masuk ke neraka jahimMU.
Oleh karena itu, terimalah taubatku dan tutupilah dosa – dosaku.
Sesungguhnya Engkau maha mengampuni dosa – dosa besar.
Dosa – dosa ku seperti hamparan pasir di laut, maka terimalah taubatku wahai Dzat yang Maha Agung…
Umurku terus berkurang setiap hari, namun dosa – dosaku bertambah setiap hari…
Bagaimana aku mampu menanggungnya ?
Ya Tuhanku, hambaMu yang berlumur dosa ini datang kepadaMU
Sesungguhnya aku benar – benar berdosa kepadaMU
Dan bila Engkau tidak mengampuni aku, kepada siapa lagi aku berharap selain Engkau ?”

pic of the day

HAHAHHHH

in a short infatuation phase.nothing much.

of things that remain forever,virtually exist.

ONE DAY.

so we can tell that we were here.

blue monday!

psst trial pics from huda's pics edit website.picmonkey is not like it used to be like before( no more free editing & now we need to sign for a royale membership!)

so this is you playing strata of coolness/awesomeness in your friendlist?to hell with that.
i never friend with anyone just to classified them with some sort of justification of hipster level(or so you dont realise this).
be gone,bye.

my no-escapade rage

seriously man.those guys are killing me in fb with those pics of sandy baech and blue beaches,boat riding's everywhere.*dies*i,then resumed my stereotyped-mediocre life schedule that i was supposed to observe my case studies in kl.however,not so long after a few minutes of observation,came down the heavy rain pouring all over kl(hyperbola)and lead me towards a glass walled paradise.(i knew i was destined to be here!)
so i got stucked inside for some quite good hours.muahaha.and who cant resist a 39.90 pair of pants,right?

...and also,i really hope there'll come one lucky time when this scarf got it's price drop,sooner or later.till we meet again scarfy.

The Finale.

 malam Pesta Sarong.

 The Handsomes never ending photoshoots.

our long victory run!

         
Picture taken right after we danced our heart out.night of magnificent fire swirl & splashes,and mystical  moves splendour that captivate the audience.Standing ovation given to us at the end of the performance..And we,humbly proud,amazed & touched..

RENTAS 2013,the last archifest for The Kreinovans.

p/s:too bad no sibu escapade for me.

wanderlust

reasons why we should go abroad(particularly to U.K).
1# it's seasonal weather for 365 days out there,thus i foresee a land of bright wild flowers in spring, & summer,cold & chilly nights with blue hues during fall & winter.ooh la la!
2# experimental style and clothes?heck yes!
3# travelling to countless iconic & historic monuments & buildings?you name it!
4# crossing these europe countries from one to one? pack a bag,a camera and a map,and off we go!
5#i need to meet him.i mean by chances.yeap.somekind like drama situation.just want to say "hey,im here.ok,bye!"
6#dezeen watch store.
7# to serve for a better nation.fuyo.
8# venice.
9# capri island.
10# to be in love.

the (dream-only) paradise i cant enjoy this weekend.shesh.

last weekend went on its way bombastically.Two awards in one big night.Gotta update soon.right after design-making session for tomorrow!
Peace out! :D

while being so much comfortable with my current fb (half) deactivation mode,somehow,i really need to pop up the page little while for some fashion stuff update.lets put this to an exception to the my new twisted concept.gahahh

impromptu affair

meet new girls from the east side.

it's a real crazy,the moment you saw the red tags with the power word of attraction,SALE on them(proven to weaken women worldwide)

& dangling string of beads,flashy geometric pieces carefully arranged together,ready on the racks,out for grab.gila.jadi super-gila.

happily bought those with a piece of the 50 ringgit note.

jyeahhh

what today might say about tomorrow.Insyallah.

tau tak apa aku nak masa depan yang dalam masa terdekat ni.

cita-cita nak pergi tempat orang.

harapnya U.K.

kalau ikutkan hati rasa berani sangat nak menapak kat sana.biarlah lama-lama pun takpe.

sebab rasa macam best bernafas kat tempat baru,dimana kau tak kenal orang yang duduk kiri dan kanan kau.

pastu buat benda-benda baru yang seems interesting.

oh yeahh

TAPAI

rahsia Tuhan ni banyak sangat.
kadang-kadang persoalan-persoalan tentang itu,ini,
datang dalam benak fikiran,
'buat aku sesak.
'eh tolonglah,banyak lagi kerja dunia yang aku kena buat.tapi dorongnya lebih kepada mengelamun.'
Tuhan,
aku tak nampak satu pengakhiran yang baik.
kalau boleh cerita ni dijadikan makanan,ianya adalah tapai.
naik muak.
nak muntah.
alahai nasib.

okay.time to say babai guys.
babai tilam
babai bantal
babai selimut tebal gebu
babai air tapisan
babai kemalasan
babai cicak dan lipas aneh
babai ina & giada :(
babai aca and iqah.(looove to annoy them muahaha)
babai babai babai

somewhere in universe of mind

what will you do when you have big crush on someone you never meet.
when only pictures speak for the reasons of your admiration.
crazy,huh.
i know soon this feeling will perish.
but i wish i have the gut to put you in my friends list.
but i dare to cut my fingernail if i do so.
okay buybye.
i foresee trouble and rocks ahead.
but lets endure it for the last chapter before we close the book.
once & for all!

T A D A H H H H . . . . . . . . . .H H H H HA HA

in a state where flowers bloom and dead leaves were swept by the wind,
there i was.
sunken in midst of thoughts.
accompanied by the mysterious nightingale that fills the cold air.
pardon me,please,sir.
breath me some new air.
crack me some jokes.
whistle loud in the darkest of night so i can be wide awake,again.
dont shriek nor screech.
either way,it'll find failure to succumb the valor i made.
restart your game anew.so i can play along.
i know the victory's mine.

worthy of you.

we've lost our friendship somewhere in the journey of finding & tracking our own paths.

but girls.if only you triplet knew,that,chapter of story of ourselves back in early highschool years,that's when i learnt and gained the means of true friendship.those days we listened to mp3 player,all suprised birthday parties,gossiping,cheering each other in the morning,those late-night studies and stalking handsome seniorss.dangg..the origin of the genuine bond of best buddies came from us.thanks for filling up one of the great chapter that's worth to be told to our grandchildren,someday.

'wishing you keep me closer,im a lazy dancer,when you move,i'll move with you...'

guess our journey didnt ryhme with the lyrics.

nah.it's okay.i still love you guys though ;)

 anyway guys,i'm glad to tell you,later on,i found a great bunch of girls throughout my late adolescence period.they're the melted cheese in my cheeseburgers.we painted the town red like crazy                                       (+ dramatically)muahaha

sooner than later.here i am.as usual,always & always encircle in love of wonderful people.
you tell me how to not get crazy when i tend to spend most of my time with these peeps 24/7 than myself in the studio!haha

Thanks Allah for filling my life with these amazing creatures.You know i heart them.May our places be in Your Jannah.Amin.

wow.theydrawandcook is really an awesome inspiration to anyone of you who loove to have kickin' fun in the kitchen!guess i can make some of anything,and bring some to my mates as er...new sem's welcoming gifts!how about candies?lotsa lotsa sweet candiess.after all everyone has a sweet tooth.admit it admit it :)

oh hi,hi..

ni haa aku nak melepaskan rasa ketidakpuashatian aku.

adelah sorang hamba Allah ni,

dok tak habis-habis luahkan perasaan kat fb.

mmg newfeeds aku untuk status emo dia sorang.

i mean,takdelah emo manapun,

aku pun faham la her condition for time being,

tapi,sebagai insan yang waras lagi rasional,

daripada kita mengadu domba kat fb yang takdelah manfaat manapun ni,

baiklah hang pi selak2 website yang lagi berguna kalau dah kata perlukan motivation & so on.archidaily ke,dezeen ke,ar ke.

ni dok taip Tuhan tak nak kita give-up lah,saat kita jatuh tu lah kita kene bangun ,yada yada.

memang la ape yg ditulis tu takde salahnya,

tapi kita kene la kaji balik dimana salahnya bila benda yang tak diingini semenanya berulang lagi.banyak kali.

yang menggeramkan lagi keaadan,bila orang tegur ada je alasan yang nak dibagi.

kadang-kadang(kadang-kadang) ada perlu kita dengar dan ikut dan implement nasihat dan teguran orang sekeliling kita.mungkin through their advices we can make something even way better,kan?

tak salah kalau dah selalu sgt ikut jalan A kita cuba jalan B pulak.then see how it goes.

mengadu sana-sini tanpa melaksanakan perubahan pun bukan satu cara yang sihat.

sebagai seorang kawan aku nak kita semua berjaya sama-sama.

i took my own advises.aku pun sedar aku taklah bagus manapun nak ckp ni depan-depan.penakut gak aku ni.

mari berharap kita sama-sama tak lemas.

G I R D Y O U R L O I N S

“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma – which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

RIP Steve

p/s.gird your loins.new sem's big wave's coming through.deadly & unforgivable.fearless & furious.pretty fun,though.aha!

semua benda yang ditunggu dah pun tiba.
seprti alat pengurusan,keputusan peperiksaan,..
tapi ni haa,barang yang akhir sekali ni tak nampak batang hidung lagi.
beg cantik.cantik lah kot gamaknya.

i think it's time to eat maggi.let's go!

balik kampung-kait buah kelapa-minum air kelapa fresh dari pokok-hari panas-mandi kat lata-hujan renyai-bagi itik makan-main kejarkejar sama itik-good times dgn mereka-bau aroma nasi lemak berlemak-petang yang redup-duduk atas tanah-pandang rumah sebalik latar awan dgn pokokpokok tinggi-sambil isi buku sketch.

:) 

too bad it only lasted for short days.tapi takpa.banyak lagi hari-hari mendatang perlu disumbat dengan kenangan dan memori yang aman sentosa.

sekian.

R O A R

leave all your old,boring printed shawls,shirts,pants in the box.here are some new fresh,eccentric prints you  should gather in your closet!we bring you young,raw,unpredictable,energetic patterns and pieces out there muahahah potential buyers: maidens who are dare to be different.*amboi,angan-angan*

....

semua orang ada mimpi.
semua orang ada cita-cita
sama macam aku.macam kau.
mungkin caranya berbeza-beza,tapi matlamatnya sama.
aku buka tin tu guna pisau,kau buka guna parang.
dengan tujuan yang sama
untuk meratah isi laici yang segar dan berjus tu.
sama-sama nak merasai nikmat dari Nya.

katanya mahukan macam-macam duaributigabelas ni.apa tunggu lagi?

depa dah maiiiii.hahah.pemangkin kekurusan dah sampai.tunggu masa hati yang tabah dan gagah nak melawan nafsu.

ini adalah sesuatu yang gila!nak panjat bukit nun tu pun merangkak dalam mimpi je.hmph

hasbi rabbi jallallah
maa fi qalbi ghayrullah
nur muhammad sallallah

cukuplah tuhanku sebagai allahku
tiada dalam hatiku selain allahku
cahaya muhammad-- selawat atasnya.

laisalaha mindunillahi kaasyifah
laisalaha mindunillahi kaasyifah

tiada baginya selain allah yang maha melindungi
tiada baginya selain allah yang maha melindungi

laailaaha illallah
al maliqul haqqul mubiin
muhammadur rasuulullah
saadiqul wa'dil aamin

tiada tuhan selain allah
raja aku, yang paling benar, yang paling telus
muhammad itu rasul allah
manusia benar dan adil dan jujur

astaghfirullaha 
innallaah kaana tawwaaba.
ampuni aku wahai allah
sesungguhnya allah itu maha menerima taubat

-found this on Fynn Jamal's page.Elok buat nyanyian after solat :)

i hate when i get to choose between two almost similar things when you can only have either one.I always get caught up in this situation.

it's like when you're on the Voice stage,you ought to choose to be on team Adam or team Blake.
see,how hard is that to make good choice.
There goes..baroque or plain trapeze.
been considering for these past few days.i know it's like stupid matter for some people but little they didnt know,finding the rightest bag is crucial for woman of all ages.They like pre-defined who we are.And it matters because it is where we kept our junks safe.yeah.

I M T E L L I N G Y A

im telling you.im gonna be skinny.No.

im telling you i love that baroque bag and im gonna buy it.No.

im telling you i'll start my hiking 'duty' this evening.No.

im telling you im starting to collect ideas for my business.No.

No im not gonna put my head on the pillow.I am now.

No im not gonna eat nasi lemak for four consecutive weeks.I already did this morning.

No im not gonna lie to myself for this whole day that im finally out from the nesting zone.Too bad.

I lied

T_________T

is this madness or what

i really need to grad in shape.seriously,who wouldnt want to dress in fine m size baju kurung.and,we all know,a big sized lady wouldnt be a perfect match to an awesome pair of stilettos! ;( and,and sape tak nak pi keje pakai santik-santik without this makcik-like figure?yes!that's exactly how i felt right now.a very mak-cik like figure.isk isk.
and the worst part is,though i'm heavily concern bout my weight,yet my stomach still get stuffed with these artery clotting and fattening foods.so much of dreaming a healthy figure,aite?

2013 RESOLUTION

TO SUCCEED ON MY OWN TERM.

in architecture,life,& my personal likings.

22 years old of odd things should be renewed.